Cross Eyed: Can you laugh in church?

Church, if there is anything I am about, it’s being real with my walk with God.

I get upset, like Peter; I get bold, like Paul; I wax sentimental like John; and can wax eloquent like David. I’m still trying to rock the bling like Solomon, but ah, you can’t win them all.

That said, if there was one thing that almost caused me to start my own church out of my garage – lots of stiff folk warming pews and not enough enjoying their Christianity. It’s all about witnessing, and if I met some of those oddballs would I even be interested in becoming like them?!

Um, probably not. So, I choose to believe Jesus was a hilarious cat, along with being God in the flesh and all. He had to be, because we are not created to go through life as if we work in a library. NOW, thanks to Mars Hill Church‘s own Mark Driscoll, I have someone getting my back.

This week in video evangelism is an excerpt from one of his messages: Was Jesus Funny? It’s worth the listen. Peace.

Looking for that Valentine’s gift to stand out in the crowd?

Guys… because let’s face it, gals don’t typically forget… if you are rummaging through the aisles of that 24-hour pharmacy searching for your Fair Lady’s gift today, have no fear.

HiScrivener’s got your back thanks to the UK’s Times Online and these gifts certainly to make this Valentine’s Day a memorable one. Now if you want full details, visit the story. But here’s the highlights:

1. 

   Now, THAT is getting in the spirit

   Word up – Nothing says love, like… well, the word “love”. Buy it here and experience amore all year long.

2. Scratch N’ Sniff – You know, that’s not an exaggeration but a better sense of decorum forbids me for embellishing that example.
3. Tunnel of Love – Go skydiving and grab a kiss for a little more than $100 U.S. (Sorry, I don’t have the pounds symbol. Respect to my British brethren). Question: how in the world can you smooch at 70,000 feet when you are screaming bloody murder?
4. The Blade of Romance – Imagine giving your woman a real machete over a candlelight dinner. No worries, it has her name on it. Mwah!
5. The Tree of Life – Support the environment and your own personal cause at the same time. Boring, but you know they deliver.
6. Adopt a Book –  How sweet. Buy her Wuthering Heights or Pride & Prejudice, as if it was her own. Just stay away from Lady Chatterley’s Lover. I hear it’s not the best to keep a marriage together.
7. Tea and whatever else goes with tea – Rose bud tea. How cute. So does the guy impress her by saying, “Yeah, it’s really oolong too”?!
8. Chocolate Couture – Guys with bad pick-up lines and even cheesier ways of marriage romance can actually drop, “You’re wearing it. Growl.” And get away with it with this oddball gift.
9. And For Your Friend Too – This is more for the daters in Christendom. Why stop at buying your betrothed flowers and a card? Buy Fluffy some sustainable kibbles & bits. Yummy.

There’s more, but that’s my community service for the day. Happy heart day, Wall Watchers.

Christian music artists create “Live Worship Aid”

One of the biggest problems in the Church today is our people just don’t seem to get along all that well… unless of course you stick a cause close to Jesus’ heart, and miraculously all those denominational debates go by the wayside.

We really are, you know

“We are the World,” indeed, according to WOW News’ Reuters: Faithworld

In an effort to use music to help alleviate poverty throughout the world, a dozen of Christian music’s best-known singer-songwriters met in Scotland a year ago to create a special project. “CompassionArt: Creating Freedom From Poverty” is the brainchild of Delirious frontman Martin Smith. It features Michael W. Smith, Steven Curtis Chapman, Israel Houghton, Chris Tomlin, Paul Baloche, CeCe Winans, Darlene Zschech and other notable acts donating all proceeds to charity.

This is what we call, in the biz, “a good move”. CompassionArt is currently supporting 16 different and worthwhile philanthropic organizations.

MEMO to every single worship pastor – and worshipper – out there: BUY THESE SONGS! Use them to bring your congregations into higher platitudes of worship, but know you are helping millions of people in the process.

All sales and publishing royalties go to charity. And because the songs are likely to be embraced by the church, they’ll have a longer shelf life and provide a continual revenue stream — “hopefully for 50, 60, 70 years, if we steward it right,” Houghton says. “It’s definitely a different type of residual income. If a song connects with the church worldwide, and if it’s put in hymn books and becomes a classic, that could make a difference for several generations.”

Wall Watchers, for more information on “creating freedom from poverty”, please… go here and pass it on. I could share many scriptures about helping humanity, but you know what to do. Peace.

GodTube creates a patch to stop losing air, gets “tangled” in process

Once upon a time, there was a global video sharing site called “GodTube”.

This “YouTube for God” housed family-friendly and evangelical videos people, like yours truly, would peruse the fine work housed therein and share with people everywhere – we’ll call them “Wall Watchers”.

But, things weren’t going so well for the Intertube site as the aforementioned folk, again like yours truly, began finding more Jesus videos on YouTube than said Jesus video site; thus making the site almost obsolete.

Now, it seems HiScrivener wasn’t the only one, so the makers decided to go down the primrose path of rediscovery and rebranding, according to this post my Mashhead.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

According to a video posted to the site [above], GodTube is making a name change, and “becoming a hybrid of Facebook, MySpace, and YouTube.” The site will still be faith-based, but moving beyond video sharing to include other social networking features.

Why? Noted in the article, and linked here in all its glory, is a visual from Quantcast that reads GodTube’s heralded 2.7 million visitors has fizzled to 692,000. Big deal, yeah, but that’s all in THREE MONTHS! Man, the holidays really create a pinch for faith-based folks, eh? And ironic too.

The name? As you see in the video, “Tangle”.

Zzzzzzzzzzzz. I’m sorry, you said something? Look, this site is great for the church but a new name isn’t going to attract new visitors. Having a blog on this site really isn’t going to help considering people – yeah, like me – already have a blog.

What they need is news, real PR and marketing. You know, earning the attention of potential users instead of you know, trying to buy their attention. That sound you hear is the GodTube execs getting tangled in the whiffed air created by Google news searches. Uh, call me for a second chance?

Are megachurches becoming more like Church-Mart?

In Christendom, there are several arguments… er, healthy debates that will last until the rapture:

1. If God wants his children to prosper while on earth, why is there so much ado about prosperity?
2. Does being a real Christian mean living in poverty, or at least driving a hooptie?
3. Glossolalia: Praying under divine influence or speaking under the influence?
4. If Jesus healed people by faith, and we have Jesus’ power inside of us, then logic says… ah, you get it.
5. AND, this one, as noted in the story from the Houston Business Journal:

Critics claim ‘big box’ churches are more focused on entertainment than religion, but today’s religious facilities are using technology and savvy marketing to transform themselves into community hubs.

It's the new Hollywood Squares. God help us.

So, are they? Many critics, pundits and Christians say a resounding, “AMEN!”

“The goal is to reach the ‘unchurched,’” says Pete Ed Garrett, Studio Red Architects partner. “The business side of that is to find out who your customers are and find a way to reach them. They want the exterior to inspire curiosity and draw people inside. This means the religious iconography is purposely left off. There are usually no big steeples, crosses or stained glass.”

Working in and with the media pays the bills for the HiScrivener clan, so this is a issue close to my heart. There is always a place in this world for the old rugged cross at the old dilapidated church.

Those picturesque houses of worship are the backbone of Christianity, but these days, some of the people leading those houses make up the wishbone… and honestly, it ain’t helping the whole Great Commission thingy.

And regretfully, as it appears in this riveting article, the wishbone is for plasma TVs over platforms for the Gospel; stained-walled frescos instead of stained-glass windows; and a good con game over righteous conviction. So, where did the design for the house of the Lord go anyway? What attributes are inside these “big box” churches – and the people inside them?

Coffee bars, book stores and even a bowling alley — leaders of large churches want their church to be an integral part of the community surrounding it, and they are willing to invest in it. Even smaller to midsized churches draw in outsiders through “fellowship” facilities. Megachurches take this to a new level with video games, concerts and food courts.

Question: Is the big box craze currently seen on TBN… er, a neighborhood street near you truly a quest to become involved in the community, or is it a modern-day voyage upward in the Tower of Babel?

It seems we are more concerned about being “seeker-sensitive”  than being seekers of the will of God. There are several blogs dedicated the reality of Christ (note “Another Brick on the Wall” – just pick one), and many, many more readers of said blogs who carry the “Acts 28” message wherever they go (let it stew, you’ll get it).

Yeah, I thought so.

What this article made me ponder is the very premise for “The Writing on the Wall”: God is desperately trying to get our attention despite the lukewarm pablum of some of those preaching his word.

We need truth. We need real messages that will empower us and make us agents of change. Do we get that when preachers would rather talk about married couples should have seven straight days of sex, convince their members to join multi-level marketing scams or even better, lie to the world about having cancer and then, uh really just have a hankering for porn?

Not so much. And it probably breaks his heart.

People, those big boxes full of fluff, pomp and circumstance are not the churches God envisioned when the Holy Spirit descended and the praise of the Lord ascended in Acts 2. Rather, WE ARE!

I’m sorry to still be steppin’ on my proverbial soap box, but we are supposed to be living epistles, not pseudo apostles. There is no problem with big boxes, if God is directing tens of thousands of people to be in one building at one time, sweet. Let’s just ensure through demanding more of Jesus, of his ministers and his people what is being shared inside that box isn’t just “jack”.

If you know what I mean. And I think you do. But if not, unfortunately, the “show” will go on.