Posts Tagged ‘Todd Bentley’

I once heard a pastor, whom I greatly admire, say something that made the “Great Commission” make all the sense in the world:

“The number one reason for Atheism in this country is the actions of most people who call themselves Christians.”

Amen! And evidently, a recent survey noted by USA Today suggests that to not only be prolific, but also prognostication.

A new survey of U.S. adults who don’t go to church, even on holidays, finds 72% say “God, a higher or supreme being, actually exists.” But just as many (72%) also say the church is “full of hypocrites.” Indeed, 44% agree with the statement “Christians get on my nerves.”

prayer-2You know, I should write this in ALL CAPS (and in bold) so you could hear my voice reverberating on these walls as I shout and yawp about the need for the whole Church to wake up, stand up and man (or woman) up!

And for the rest of us, we just need to pray like life depended on it! And it does.

There is no greater pool of humanity where the rotten apples spoil the proverbial bunch than Christianity, which is why the zealots, the realists, the devoted and the public need to be the best witnesses possible…

…and the televised, the cults, the sects, the fake, the rich and famous and the uh, “prosperous” need to realize the error of their ways.

Why? This is all your fault!


What does it say that “more than one in five” Americans would rather not go to church and humanistically believe in God than act like some of the fools and charlatans seen on a religious TV broadcast near you?! Don’t get me wrong, I thank God for Christian television – its premise, not what it’s become.

What it needs to be is a beacon of hope, the salt of the earth, a light in the darkness, a city set on a hill. It’s not.

Why? Consider the string of stories seen on TV that best represent God to the common person, the average believer:

Jim Jones, Robert Tilton, Warren Jeffs, Jimmy Swaggart, Jim Bakker, Pat Robertson, Earl Paulk, Paula White, Todd Bentley, Carlton Pearson, David Koresh, Oral & Richard Roberts, Michael Guglielmucci, Mike Murdoch, Paul Crouch, Benny Hinn, Creflo Dollar, Kenneth Copeland, and on… and on… and on… and on… and on.

There’s a lot of faith in that dank room, a lot of influence and notoriety, and a lot of serious issues! However, these are some of the collective misfits folk call to memory when asked, “Who represents the Body of Christ?”

wwjd-for-realRight, wrong or indifferent: it’s always the vocal minority, the swarthy tail that wags the dog all day long. And they are it. To that end, it’s the mission of the real Christians, the living epistles to change those unfortunate and misguided perceptions.

It’s a dubious task, but if you’re up to it, our work could pay big dividends for the persecuted, the passionate and the pronounced in a world of people who really can’t stand us. Sure, we are nice people and folk in the workplace like us, they really like us.

But they watch us like hawks waiting for us to plummet in a whirlwind of sin that would take out a small village in Indonesia. And they would applaud all the while chalking up our names to the growing list of noteworthy evangelists and “other prominent folk who call themselves religious” all in the name to say, “I told you so.”

In other words, their actions aren’t doing us any favors. God is faithful but some of those who pass themselves off as “his people” are not so much.

God blesses us with money and sustenance, but those folk are chock full of greed. God gives us grace, but those nitwits with false humility ball that gift up and hurl it back into our faces. And what we have been attempting to tell the throngs quoted in this pathetic survey: God’s son is the way, the truth and the life but regretfully no one is coming to the Father because of “them.”

Most of the unchurched (86%) say they believe they can have a “good relationship with God without belonging to a church.” And 79% say “Christianity today is more about organized religion than loving God and loving people.”

Pastors and parishioners alike, if you don’t read a forsaken, plotted word I type, please read this: there is a distinct and incontrovertible reason why churches tend to be emptier these days… it’s the nasty church folk running all the good, unsaved folk out the door in the name of “being spiritual.”

Ever hear the adage, “You can be so spiritually minded that you are no earthly good”?

Yeah, neither have the people who have caused the 72 percent exodus of potential believers. Get real, Church. We have a job to do. You up to it? If so, see you in the trenches. Trust me, there will be plenty of room!


The naval sojourner known to the masses as Popeye once exclaimed, “That’s all I can stands and I can’t stands no more.”

So like the anchor clanker, I must let off some steam, eats me spinach and hum “Anchors Away” as I feverishly type. This should be a doozie.

Back when the Wall was being constructed, trends and stories were evident but one stood out from the rest like Kate Moss at a Jenny Craig study group – Todd Bentley.

I heard about the knees in the gut and literally knocking out some chic’s teeth, but I considered that charismatic ballyhoo and let it ride.

After all, I saw a guy get laid out in the power of God and landed with such veracity (no thanks to an apt “catcher” with alligator arms) that his toupee flew off at least 15 feet. True story.

But once you hear the same issues over and over and over again, you begin to think maybe it really is your breath that stinks and not everyone just making ugly faces at you. So I delved into the WWWorld (armed with my WWWord) to search for a respite and a resolution.

Initially, a BIG HEARTY shout out to the ‘other bricks in the Wall’ in here: Pulpit Pimps, I’m Speaking Truth and Slaughter of the Sheep. OTHER huzzahs to noted visitations of mine: Independent Conservative and Real Christianity. Those delicious blogs, and the vast array of information I found in the mainstream, helped with this much belabored post. (In other words, pack a lunch. You’ll be here awhile).

[BTW, what’s a brutha’ to do for a link on your blogrolls?! We’re like-minded, share the same interests and could even have Tupperware parties… and some such. IJS.]

So, if I have been putting this off for a slow news day, then why the impetus now? Click and grab the barf bag:

Ah, after you grab the spearmint gum, wasn’t that portentous? A study Bible based on meetings that most theologians consider to be the largest sciamachy in Christendom since Jonestown?! And Todd Bentley doesn’t think we think that he thinks this will buy him a few more tattoos – wherever on his portly carcass he can find uninked flesh. Um, not so much.

What’s the beef? (Tee hee. I made a funny). Here’s a guy proclaiming the works of the Lord, laying hands on folk and doing it in the name of Jesus, right? WRONG! What’s the adage? “If it looks like a duck and walks like a duck…” Listen, after weeks of broadcasting live on GOD TV and his own tooled Web site, directing countless of people to Jesus (and evidently to the nearest ATM) and seeing them healed, isn’t it a little odd that dude would suddenly pack up his tent and leave the campfires of revival?!

Not if that duck was actually a CHICKEN! Note the lovely ABC News expose that allowed all of us to look behind the curtain to see just how withered the Wizard of Lakeland is:

It was so nice that ABC Nightline had to do it twice. (BTW, I know one of the producers on this piece. The joy that was had creating this voyeuristic butchery was utterly contagious).

Proof?! He said he has proof. Written proof, yet for some reason, he is opposed to due diligence as if it was a disease and he needs a healing for no immune system. He blacks out names, numbers and networks. Yeah, that’s too legit to quit, eh? Dude, let a pro give you a quickie on PR 101. Kinda like the book you should publish, “Revival for Dummies”. (And yes Melvin, that photoshopped picture is genius!)

If you have to hide your results, they may look contrived. If you feel the need to pimp yourself to the media only to act like the biggest tease at an all-girls’ school, you may look like a ho after all. If you need to vociferously promote your healings and beg the media to cover you, then turn around and run from the press when they can collectively smell the drivel you are shoveling, you may not be working in the same anointing of Christ who incidentally didn’t require a PR firm yet is still substantiated these millenia later. Hmmm…

In other words, the jig is up. This shameless story belongs on a special illuminated spot on the Wall. You were called out and like the bully that sticks a hamhock in the gut of unsuspecting folk, and run with tail tucked between your legs counting your cash all the way.

Evidently, there wasn’t enough duckets in your collections, because now you have this uh, “Bible” to sell. Great. Dude goes out and crushes about 15 Happy Meals between services, shows off a little more ink, crack some old lady in her mullet and instantly we have America’s next great fiction novel.

Whatever happens, rest assured, he will follow one example of Christ as he has given up the ghost! Think he will come back? Not unless he is escorted back to Lakeland with a subpoena. That guy has waddled to his last pulpit and drop kicked his last saint. If you have read any of the aforementioned sages, many scriptures discussing a false prophet and wicked fruit has raced across your vision like dead presidents has with Todd Bentley’s. However, here is another you may not have seen:

“Vengeance is mine, and recompense; their foot shall slip in due time; for the day of their calamity is at hand” (Deuteronomy 32:35)

Kinda’ takes the wind out of those large sails you call ‘jackets’, huh?

Remember the adage mentioned earlier? “Quack, quack bro.” You better find a nice pond where you can fly south because if you are the anathematic malefactor these videos and those countless testimonies portray you to be, then get used to that unfavorable and merciless heat. You are going to be feeling a lot of it where you are going.