Posts Tagged ‘mother’s day’

Thanks to a masonry shout out to Another Brick in the Wall, Polycarp [AKA MultiTilapia, PluristicFish, MultiplePersonalityDisorderStryper, et al] by way of Politico and AmericaBlog (the supreme scooper of this… er, uh, story), we have a fascinating story of hyperbole, science fiction, religion, the occult and half-baked folk who seriously need to seek professional help.

Oh yeah, and the BarackStar’s mama. Thought that would get your attention…

Obama Mama DramaSo, the Mormons have this quirky practice where they believe they can baptize a living person on behalf of a corpse.

This way, any breathing person who in fact doesn’t possess the soul of the dead one can be the baptisee by proxy.

Yeah, perfectly normal.

However, as bananas as this practice is (which uh, completely slaps this Apostle Paul guy in the mullet, so says 1 Corinthians 15:29), the Latter-day Saints are “investigating a ‘serious breach of religious code'” for the baptism (vicarious, temple baptism) of Stanley Ann Durham, the deceased mother of President Barack Obama.

Should be another normal post on the Wall, eh?

Thanks to this screen grab from the registration-only, Mormon-only Web site, FamilySearch.org, we see the LDS church snagged the soul of the President’s mother – fresh with her new posthumous baptism date?! No, you haven’t seen this on MSNBC? Don’t fret… you probably won’t.

But, as we see on the dates given, the Mormons (who honestly can – and will – do this to anyone) baptized President Obama’s mother amidst the election.

Why is this news to me? Two words: Proposition 8

The LDS Church took on hell to combat gay marriage in California. The money, the advocacy, the mission against – in their words – a liberal agenda. Well, who heads up said “liberal agenda”?!

That would be the son of whose mother you just tried to snatch from death’s grasp to baptize – only to use another person in her stead.

There is a reason they do it in secret. Look at that thing?!

There is a reason they do it in secret. Look at that thing?!

What the…

I didn’t see the Pope asking for former priests to be taken out of purgatory thanks to the long arm of the Mormon law. I don’t believe Billy Graham called up the temple lords looking for Baptist legends to be resurrected.

You see, both know the rapture of the saints will take care of that ballyhoo. But while the Mormons have their eyes set on extraterrestrial lands of beneficence, children of God KNOW their Daddy and how he would act.

My father ain’t a monkey and he dang sure ain’t E.T. This is not a political story, this is a theological story. It just so happens that leader of the free world is thrust in the middle of this boondoggle. My only question is if someone tried dragging my mother through some muck and mire, I would expense everything I had to open a can of whoop @$$.

He is the president… and what’s he doing about this?! Only time will tell. Well, unless the Mormons get involved.

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Since the beginning of time, Christians have been told and read about the great men of God… and whether they liked to admit it or not (and they didn’t back in the day), there were even greater women.

Same holds true today, as extolled by the WOW News’ Pew Forum, which shows us what is the stronger sex, spiritually.

It’s Women’s History Month, so what a timely story. So, gather round all you bra burners, feministas and adoring homemakers (still the hardest job in the world… hi, baby) for some cold facts:

  • 86% of women are affiliated with a religion. Men? 79%
  • 77% of women have “absolute certain belief” in God. Men? 65%
  • 66% of women pray daily. Men? 49%
  • 63% of women say religion is very important. Men? 49%

einsteinHrm. Let’s see… we don’t like organization, question a lot of things, don’t like to talk much and don’t give absolutes to much besides what is set on TiVo and how we like our meat. Stay classy, fellas.

You know, this really isn’t a surprise, is it?

The Bible is chock full o’ examples of strident women who have done mighty exploits for God that no man would have ever considered. No, seriously:

  • Sarah – This is a woman who had a old, decrepid hubby talking to her with his withered old body rocking the matrix (take the blue pill, get it) at the age of 100. Oh yeah, she’s 90… and has to have the baby! I know 35-year old strapping fellas who pass out at the sight of needle, and some nonagenarian woman is going to go through that?! No, thanks! And no offense, God. I would have laughed too.
  • Mary – Did you know… this is a sheltered little girl who has insomnia one night, and suddenly “FLASH”! This thundering voice in the window says that she will carry the son of God, but minus all that “getting pregnant the typical way” mess. I don’t know a single dude who wouldn’t have blamed the sudden weight gain on a box of Twinkies, much less talk about going on “The Biggest Loser.”
  • King Lemuel’s Mama – Who? Click on the link and read the first line. G’head, I’ll wait. Oooooh! That mama. Listen fellas. Any woman who can create such an indellible picture for her son about the kind of woman to bring home for approval is genius. Any woman who can do that so well that every God-fearing man who reads that passage in Proverbs goes to the throneroom pleading for “that chic” is perspicacity beyond words.

Yeah, I could go on, but why. I’m already emasculated writing this post. I need my dignity for Father’s Day. Sigh.

Coming to a Planned Parenthood near you

Coming to a Planned Parenthood near you

There are so many things small enough to stuff in a Christmas stocking – an iPod, candy, action figures, jewelry, and oh yeah… gift cards for abortions!

You think I’m yanking your chain? Check this horrific story from ABC News on the latest trend to hit the holidays.

“Women in particular are likely to forgo basic medical needs when faced with putting gas in their car or food on the table,” said Planned Parenthood of Indiana’s president and CEO, Betty Cockrum. Planned Parenthood provides contraception, pap smears and other routine health services for women, as well as abortions. The gift certificates, ranging in values from $25 to $100, can be redeemed for all clinic services.

Ah, when you care enough to send the very, VERY worst! And I mean this literally, “What in the hell do you think you are doing with this “gift”?

Is this a surreptitious way to get around parents who need a stocking stuffer, and one more card will do the trick? Was glossy lipstick and bad teenage music just not genteel enough, so you had to get something more practical? Afraid your little girl would stick out in the crowd… with her promiscuous teenage belly?

Oh, and I love this PR statistic given in the story. Take it away, girl:

Planned Parenthood is quick to argue some 95 percent of women who come to their clinics come for basic health services — not abortion. “It’s about basic health care. It’s about annual exams, it’s about pap smears, it’s about birth control,” said Cockrum. “I would be amazed if a dime of it goes toward an abortion.”

Not quite their target demographic

Not quite their target demographic

Of course you would, lady. I know, I know. It’s basic street marketing for retail. They come in looking for that handy pap smear, but then you have some pictures on the walls and mannequins done up that get your clientele thinking differently.

You know, drugged-up little girls hooking up with those totally awesome guys playing spin the bottle and then… oops. One mannequin has a poochy belly, and another looks like a meth lab hoodrat.Yeah, that’s marketing in your face.

Visuals like that get the ladies thinking, and then before you know it, they are asking for the upsell on abortions. Payday, right?!

This is revolting, and clearly indicative of where this world is going… hell in a handbasket. Dear God, save us all, namely the girls targeted by stories like this.

Of course, the protest for universal Walmart gift cards should be growing because while parents are thinking their sweet teenage child will be striking out for that G.I. Joe and the Kung-fu action grip, they can stroll on over to another section of the store and buy a gun, a fifth of Boone’s Farm and a carton of cigarettes without the threat of getting carded.

Not quite what you expected, but ho-ho-flippin’-ho nonetheless!

Yesterday, a pioneer of Gospel music, Joyce “Dottie” Rambo, died in a bus crash in southwest Missouri according to this story and obituary from the Associated Press.

Rambo, 74, was en route to two churches in North Texas – Arlington Baptist and Fountain of Life – when the bus ran off the road and struck an embankment. Rambo was scheduled to perform in a Mother’s Day concert with Naomi Sego and Lulu Roman (yeah, the one from Hee-Haw).

It’s fitting, you know. The woman who published 2500 songs (including a sentimental favorite of My Fair Lady, “We Shall Behold Him”) and even had Dolly Parton cover HER songs, should meet the Lord on May 11. She was known to millions as “the mother of Southern Gospel.”

Dottie Rambo will be missed by many. In memoriam…

Happy Mother’s Day. This is for each of you… and it’s genius.