Marriage: If at first you don’t succeed, fail, fail, fail again

Posted: February 22, 2010 in Above the Fold, Networking
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Marriage has been considered sacrosanct among Christ followers, cardinal among people of faith. So why can’t more Christians stay married?!

Come on, people. Yous gots some ‘splainin’ to do, according to this recent article by WOW News’ The Voice.

According to the article, marriage goes deeper than the ubiquitous 50 percent end in divorce. We get that, but on a quest to find love and catch lightning in a bottle, a few people in the Church are shattering that bottle not only once, but twice with 67 percent of second marriages and 73 percent of third marriages not making the cut.

In the words of a stoic and much-maligned street poet, “Why can’t we all just get along?”

Laura Baker, founder of Prasso Ministries, says that people who divorce once are likely to do it again because they are searching for identity in another person’s love instead of the love of their Heavenly Father…

“It’s easy to think that the answer is in a new relationship, but if the person is looking for their identity in the love of another person, the relationship is likely to fail,” Baker says. “Our identity can only successfully be found in the love of our Heavenly Father and in the identity He provides. Once that is settled, new relationships have a chance to flourish.”

Here. Here.

Divorce is so common in the church that seeing a “Divorce Care” group plastered on the marquee doesn’t even make the pastor flinch. This is a pandemic issue that makes the Swine Flu seem like the common cold.

Shoot, some good-intending folk in the Church have even created kitschy terms to cover divorce, like calling people “Re-single.” Cute, and would spouses then become “pre-used”?

Although some marriages in the Church last about as long as a test drive, it seems many consider marriage as a leased relationship – if you get tired of it, hand in the keys for a new one.

Why are Christians so quick to give up? I’m not talking the women in an abusive relationship or people that get married to one person who is a polar opposite of the shrew they became. I mean the “irreconcilable differences” crowd. That just means you two can’t get along and are sick and tired of being sick and tired, so its kaputz for all that “for better or worse” crap.

Does My Fair Lady get on my nerves? You bet. And trust me, the feeling can be mutual but we meant business when we got married. She is all that, and that’s as good as it gets for me. We will not separate because God said that we should not separate. If he wants that, he will back it up with his blessing, right?

“Haven’t you read that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh?” So they are no longer two but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate” (Matthew 19:4-6 NIV).

While I applaud people for trying to find love and working to find a passion that was lost, look in your own marriage first not in the butterflies of some hottie batting eyelashes at you. Temptation – whether it’s the chocolate in the checkout lane or the seductress checking your groceries – is from the devil. And why would God bless any union devised on those roots?

Dearly departed, avowed atheist and genius comic George Carlin once quoted:

“I am” is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that “I do” is the longest sentence?

Only if you mean it, brother. Just saying.

  1. […] Marriage: If at first you don't succeed, fail, fail, fail again … […]

  2. andrea says:

    this is soooo sad,many people will be hurt.this is not Gods will for his body…she needs to get right and pray before she for Benny Hinn stand and pray ,let God move and time to spend more time alone with God…

  3. […] am not a proponent of divorce, as you can see in the previous tag on the Wall. If you can work it out, you should… that said, the Hinns worked everything out for more than […]

  4. Brother K says:

    Well, if I may plant a seed for a future post, it would seem that this ridiculous divorce rate among Christians is one of the chief reasons that Christians using ballot initiatives to “define marriage” are seen as appalling hypocrites by the LGBT community. “Sanctity of Marriage” shouldn’t be relegated to a bumper sticker during an election cycle (or fundraiser). Why bother to define it legally but then not honor it personally? I mean, doesn’t anyone notice how amazingly pre-emptive that good ol’ Wedding Vow is as they’e blabbing it out during the ceremony?

  5. Vaughn says:

    That George Carlin quote was on target! and the sad thing is that many pastors fail to convey the fact that God hates divorce or putting away of your wife, some folks like to use semantics, tomatoe or tomato?*

  6. John says:

    “…The Bible says that the research (of Barna studies) is not finding that born again people are permeated with worldliness; the research is finding that the church is permeated by people who are not born again.” ~John Piper (‘Finally Alive’)

    No doubt, Christians still do struggle with sin, even divorce. However, as John Piper notes above, how many people consider themselves “born again” when in fact, their life shows otherwise? I’m not saying that true Christians never divorce; I’m simply saying that perhaps we need to look deeper into what it really means to be a Christian. When you have almost 50% of America claiming to be “born again” and yet, of this group, many reject hell, reject the exclusivity of Christ, deny the fundamental truths of the Bible and live like the world, what is that?


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