God told this pastor to hijack a plane

Posted: September 25, 2009 in Above the Fold, OMG!, The Obvious Files
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Ever since 9-11, standards for airline security has been acclerated and enforced just a tad. Maybe you heard?

At least this guy was better prepared

At least this guy was better prepared

Well, one thing is for sure, a Bolivian pastor apparently didn’t get the news because he took more on board his flight to Cancun with more than just his carry-on bible.

Mexican investigators are evaluating a Bolivian pastor who hijacked a jetliner for possible mental illness, and trying to figure out how he managed to slip through Cancun Airport security with a fake bomb in his luggage.

Well, at least it was a fake. Just a “juice can with some lights on it.” I mean, he just wanted to put the “fear of God” in people. That’s evangelism, right? Yeah, not so much.

So, tell us Pastor Jose Flores, why the bomb? Numerology, of course.

Flores told authorities that [the recent date of] 9-9-09 is the satanic number 666 turned upside down. Speaking to reporters after he was detained, Flores smilingly told them: “Christ is coming soon.” He said he had received divine revelation that an enormous earthquake would soon strike Mexico and that he hijacked the plane to force a meeting with President Felipe Calderon.

Hey pastor, in lieu of the impending apocalypse, you may want to mix in one of those sandwich board signs telling everyone in Terminal A to repent and seek God’s face. That’s effective… and lawful under the U.S. Constitution.

But this? Suffice to say, I can think of better ways to do an illustrated sermon. Maybe I’ll carry a huge hammer to his jail cell, as an example. Given the fact this guy is a big tool, I think God will give him that revelation too.

(Masonry shout out to Crummy Church Signs for the well, crummy church sign.)

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Comments
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