Every company is revisiting marketing strategies, PR outreach and advertising budgets. If your income blows, how are you going to get more if no one knows your name.

Kinda’ like the anti-Cheers.

Among churches, there is a trend – if your denomination has the cash, spend it to put butts in seats.

Megachurches don’t have that issue because it doesn’t seem they have an agenda. You know, aside from the sundry few who are looking to fatten their wallets (we know who you are).

But for the mainstream, the monotonous and seemingly, the moth-eaten, folk aren’t interested so marketing budgets are the new investment, the new “building fund,” according to this story by the Washington Times.

The perfect preacherYou have the United Methodist Church pouring $20 million into this country so we can “Rethink Church.”

And then, the Evangelical Lutheran Church is spending a paltry $1.2 million to keep up with the Methodist Joneses with “God’s Work, Our Hands.” (sniff sniff).

But, let’s not forget the rolling stone that began gathering all this moss – the Episcopal Church, who brilliantly deciphered the mysteries of marketing the Gospel into “Get closer to God. Slice Carrots.” Eh… what the… is up with that, doc?

So, why all the cash influx to the American economy and TV sets everywhere?

From 1990 to 2008 alone, mainline Protestants dropped from 18.7 percent to 12.9 percent of the population, according to the American Religious Identification Survey.

People are tired of having to interpret the malestrom created thanks to “religious” versus “Christian.” And the only reason why this is a debated topic is because most people these who call themselves “religious” are not at all “Christian.”

stupidityYou know the types:

  • ignoring most of the Bible to create a personal doxology (cough… homosexuality in the pulpit… cough),
  • using the Bible to get paid
  • and implementing the Bible as a battering ram to hurl people into the pit of hell without offering some of the love in the Good Book.

I wonder if another brick on the wall, “Church Marketing Sucks” has heard about this tempest because it that sound you hear is a large vacuum among advertisers. Suuuuuuuuuck!

So, what is this really indicative of: people losing interest in church or just losing interest on lazy people who don’t want to do everything God recommends?

On the street there is an adage, “Keep it real.”

Instead of trying to be fully versed in scripture for sanctimony, perhaps Christians need to start sagging, beat boxing and tagging other walls (outside of this one, of course) because “keeping it real” seems to be just what the Father ordered.

And it’s free. What a PR guru Jesus is.

  1. lost sheep says:

    There is no god and if you invested a little gray matter into the subject you might open your eyes. Religion is the problem, not the solution. Modern man (at least the smart ones) has outgrown the need to pay homage to a preposterous fairytale. You must be based in the mid west because you seem simple. Next time proof read your BS. If there’s one thing I can’t stand it’s ignorance coupled with incompetence.
    Yours in Jesus, Allah, the Easter Bunny and Santa

  2. Looks like I came off a bit strong…as you can see the topic is near and dear, I can become like an overprotective parent sometimes, my apologies. I didn’t need to come across as jerk, guns blazing.

  3. I wasn’t trying for the cheap plug, but letting you know where I was coming from. I help churches communicate better, my vision is to see churches known for being the most creative communicators on the planet (afterall we serve THE Creator).

    I do think you make some sweeping generalizations, I know many of those pastors from those churches and there desire is the same as many pastors across the nation and that’s to love people, love God and help people do the same.

    Are there some that are misguided, sure. Are there some that are look for selfish gain, sure. Pastors, from big churches and small, are human afterall. While that certainly doesn’t excuse it, it might give us pause and cause to help and support instead of just point fingers…especially if it’s just because they have big sanctuaries full of people.

    You’re right, church marketing is great when used to extend the Gospel.

    • hiscrivener says:

      Michael, it was a blatant joke and a surreptitious compliment. Evidently, too so.

      And before you begin a diatribe of name calling, let’s remember you don’t really know to whom you are talking in this blogosphere thingy. I’ll bet you a dollar we know many of the same people, so what some may consider generalization, I call ruminating from experience.

      I like your points. Keep them coming.

  4. I can’t speak for everyone, but I can speak for Church Marketing Sucks, and Holy Cow Creative, and I think you might be jumping to some conclusions.

    It’s not just about putting butts in seats – though you’ll have a hard time convincing me that wanting a lot of people vs. a few people to hear truth of Christ is bad. It’s about communicating the truth in a way that people can digest and apply to their lives.

    Just as Christ did when he talked about a mustard seed as faith, sheep as followers, etc.

    The debate that a church shouldn’t use marketing are assuming much. They don’t realize they are already marketing (church sign, church building, bulletin…you’re already doing it, maybe just not doing it well) and they assume that it is an either/or. Church marketing is just part of the mix.

    • hiscrivener says:


      I completely don’t mind a cheap plug, namely when it seems you have something to back that up. Nice blog you have there, sir. “Butts in seats” was a generalization based on what most megachurches seem to want. In a perfect world, church is about the people who show up… and for what they are searching – a true connection with Christ.

      Church marketing is necessary when it is used to the purpose of extending the Gospel, not padding the numbers. Sorry for the roller coaster there. Stop by often. Peace.

  5. gcmwatch says:

    Thanks bro… this is a good report. Wow, the contempy Christianiacs are bringing their mammon worship out of the closet.


    It will save us.
    Its will save our dead churches (or at least prop up more dead bodies it seats).

    Stunning. And funny. Jesus, the PR guru.

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