Archive for December 11, 2008

Coming to a Planned Parenthood near you

Coming to a Planned Parenthood near you

There are so many things small enough to stuff in a Christmas stocking – an iPod, candy, action figures, jewelry, and oh yeah… gift cards for abortions!

You think I’m yanking your chain? Check this horrific story from ABC News on the latest trend to hit the holidays.

“Women in particular are likely to forgo basic medical needs when faced with putting gas in their car or food on the table,” said Planned Parenthood of Indiana’s president and CEO, Betty Cockrum. Planned Parenthood provides contraception, pap smears and other routine health services for women, as well as abortions. The gift certificates, ranging in values from $25 to $100, can be redeemed for all clinic services.

Ah, when you care enough to send the very, VERY worst! And I mean this literally, “What in the hell do you think you are doing with this “gift”?

Is this a surreptitious way to get around parents who need a stocking stuffer, and one more card will do the trick? Was glossy lipstick and bad teenage music just not genteel enough, so you had to get something more practical? Afraid your little girl would stick out in the crowd… with her promiscuous teenage belly?

Oh, and I love this PR statistic given in the story. Take it away, girl:

Planned Parenthood is quick to argue some 95 percent of women who come to their clinics come for basic health services — not abortion. “It’s about basic health care. It’s about annual exams, it’s about pap smears, it’s about birth control,” said Cockrum. “I would be amazed if a dime of it goes toward an abortion.”

Not quite their target demographic

Not quite their target demographic

Of course you would, lady. I know, I know. It’s basic street marketing for retail. They come in looking for that handy pap smear, but then you have some pictures on the walls and mannequins done up that get your clientele thinking differently.

You know, drugged-up little girls hooking up with those totally awesome guys playing spin the bottle and then… oops. One mannequin has a poochy belly, and another looks like a meth lab hoodrat.Yeah, that’s marketing in your face.

Visuals like that get the ladies thinking, and then before you know it, they are asking for the upsell on abortions. Payday, right?!

This is revolting, and clearly indicative of where this world is going… hell in a handbasket. Dear God, save us all, namely the girls targeted by stories like this.

Of course, the protest for universal Walmart gift cards should be growing because while parents are thinking their sweet teenage child will be striking out for that G.I. Joe and the Kung-fu action grip, they can stroll on over to another section of the store and buy a gun, a fifth of Boone’s Farm and a carton of cigarettes without the threat of getting carded.

Not quite what you expected, but ho-ho-flippin’-ho nonetheless!

my-blue-heaven-copeland-styleI think I am in the stark minority, but I believe SOME of the chosen flock who have global ministries need a jet to get around and avoid flying coach.

The Saints are freakishly worse than paparazzi! I have seen a big named preacher get off a plane (one I was consulting), and get mobbed by the throngs of folk who believed just because we were on the red eye that this minister was the only one who didn’t need to catch a healing for sleep deprivation.

That said, when you – O’ Preacher of the Friendly Skies – use said learjet for hunting expeditions, hanging out with your favorite political candidate (seen pictured here on a retreat, I believe), vacations to your second home and wine tastings halfway around the world, you need to hand over those keys because after all, I helped pay for that jet… not you.

So, as I was reading the Fort Worth [Texas] Star-Telegram, you can imagine my chagrin when I saw this story about Kenneth Copeland and his precious air limousine being dubbed NOT tax-exempt by the Tarrant County Appraisal District.

Jeffery D. Law, Tarrant chief appraiser, said the jet was denied tax exemption because the ministry failed to disclose salaries of directors as an application requires. Law said the ministry, based in Newark, northwest of Fort Worth, will protest the denial at a hearing Monday morning. “The application requires that they submit to us a list of salaries,” Law said. “They have not given it to us, and as a result we have denied their exemption.”

You like apples, Kenneth? Because those are some Granny Smiths for your tail right there.

You have – in your supreme arrogance – stated this plane has only been used for “the performing of the organization’s religious functions.” However, because you are feeling cagey about how much you pay your familyer, executives, that jet has been dubbed “commercial.”

How’s that for irony?!

Dateline: Latin America

You have seen the country, whether live or on TV. You know the stereotype. Heck, forget the stereotypes… I would like to see someone that looks like me build a house that quick, that well for that little. What. Ever.

So, suffice to say, you want to keep that population as active as possible because the states wouldn’t be half as developed as it without these guys making up the labor force. Well, you would, right?

Apparently not if you ask – you know – Latin Americans, thanks to this story from Catholic News Wire.

In a country where half the population is under 30 and it is common for help-wanted ads to state that no one over 28 need apply, older adults are not a priority for politicians and services are scarce… Throughout Latin America, societies, governments and even the Catholic Church tend to think of older adults as a burden – when they are considered at all.

retirementI’m not poly-lingual, own Rosetta Stone or am all that enlightened, but I believe you say “retirement” in Espanol as “tren-een-tah”.

There is a common belief that “aging only happens to old people,” said Ximena Romero, coordinator of the Latin American Gerontology Network.

Yeah, about that? DUH! So, why is this a deified issue on the Wall?

Considering that Latin America is the region with the widest gap between rich and poor, Christian communities are called to “promote solidarity between generations,” Romero said.

How are we supposed to do that between generations when we can’t even do that between denominations?! Folk in different churches argue over bake sales and baptisms, being filled with the Spirit and being full of spirits. What in the world make you think we will get along to discuss antediluvian riddles of moth-eaten bottles of Ben Gay?

Now, that’s an age-old question right there. Wake me when there’s an answer. In the meantime, I’m calling this seasoned guy I know to mow my grass. Peace.