Not Alex, but nice beard nonetheless.

Not Alex, but nice beard nonetheless.

Meet eighth-grader Alex Woinski.

A mild-mannered boy who in his half-Jewish/half-Catholic ecumenical roots decided he had a novel idea for this past Halloween – your favorite Savior and mine, Jesus Christ.

Evidently, that’s what the heathen principals of West Brook Middle School in Paramus, N.J. exclaimed in the school cafeteria when they first saw young Alex, shortly before they kicked his tail out of school for wearing such a heinous costume!

Woinski, who has shoulder-length brown hair, wore a white robe, a red sash, sandals, a fake beard and a crown of thorns. His mother told The Record of Bergen County that Alex was told he could keep the costume on if he removed the beard and crown of thorns. Superintendent James Montesano said the district doesn’t want students wearing costumes that could be distracting.

OK, we’ll let the Birkenstocks and tattered bedsheet slide. But proof of puberty and tree shrubs adorning your brow is something we can’t allow at West Brook Jr. High. Because with the many parents who allow their kids to go door-to-door dawning the Grim Reaper or that dumb mask from SCREAM, I suppose the visage of a young Messiah would be alarming.

Trick or Treat. Smell my feet. Give me some unleavened bread to kosher ham to eat.

Doesn’t quite have the same ring to it, huh? Yeah, I would have sent that brat home too. Good on ya’ New Jersey public schools.

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