Hannah Montana is getting out of hand-a

Posted: October 24, 2008 in IJS, PC is not for ME, Snap, Crackle and POP Culture, The Obvious Files
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

The times they are a-changing

Not your mother's Hannah Montana

A long time ago on a Disney channel not so far away lived a TV character named Hannah Montana. She was spry, bubbly and above all (at least for the merit of this story) prepubescent.

As a matter of fact, the now Miley Cyrus, is definitely amidst juvenility but still very underage. Why is that important? She’s in Hollywood, in love, in church and in jeopardy being part of a felony. You see, if she slips into temptation, her newfound Jesus-lovin’ beau will have committed statuatory rape!

Lemme see… Loves Jesus? Check. Close to having a legal record? Check. Man, sounds like some of those shady televangelists, huh?!

Anywhoo, read this and hear the cute birds chirp and hearts palpatate.

Age is just a number for 15-year-old Miley Cyrus and her 20-year-old beau, Justin Gaston“He’s a really great Christian guy, which is awesome,” she added about the underwear model.

OK, I’m not great at math, but let me try to add this up. 15… away from 20… carry the one… hold the mayo… and let’s see… uh… that’s it! A federal conviction!

Are you kidding me?! Equally yoked or not, who is the scrambled fool allowing this to happen. Oh yeah, him.

Well, while Billy Ray is dealing with Miley’s own achy breaky heart, will someone please bother to tell Dad here that fame shouldn’t be a line of demarcation against the law.

If this tool was really a “great Christian guy”, he would pay more attention to obeying the laws of this land, and less about the laying of hands. Maybe it’s just because I have a lil’ Wall Watcher who is lovely in her own right or perhaps it’s because most men are pigs, but no algebraic logarithm would make this acceptable in my book.

Then again, what do I know? I’m just some dude and not permitted to enjoy the “Best of Both Worlds.” Ah well, back to reality. HA!


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