Archive for October 23, 2008

Go see my movie!

Go see my movie!

For a few months on the Wall, we have been fancing another sport HiScrivener fancies – movie watching. Among them has been a weakness of mine, biopics. And of that, another weakness of mine, Billy Graham.

So, some tool is making an unauthorized movie of the great evangelist, and like most inventions without a patent, it has landed flat on its movie reel face.

Billy: The Early Years, directed by former teen-heartthrob actor Robby Benson, grossed an estimated $199,938 from 282 locations, an average of $709 per screen, according to Variety.

700 BUCKS per screen. That’s it. Bubkus! Typically, I would spray WD-40 on my knees and creak upon my soapbox to harangue about the Body of Christ not supporting its own, not promoting its play and not upholding its greatest mouthpiece. BUT… it’s not their fault. It’s the former “Tiger Beat” cover boy!

Name the Jesus flick recently – “Prince of Egypt”, “The Omega Code”, “Passion of the Christ”, “Facing the Giants” and now “Fireproof.” They all had a face, a name and a flippin’ marketing game plan! Just because Billy Graham has the Batphone for God, doesn’t mean the movie was entitled to be a success. As I have noted many times about my dear career, even Billy Graham has a PR man… who happens to dabble a little in movie promotions.

Maybe Robby Benson should have read the want ads in that magazine. He may have come across a phone number for a publicist or two or three. I’m just sayin’.

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The Minnesota “Profit” of God, Fraud Neulan Midkiff, climbed his pyramid scheme as high as he could sans the yodel from that Cliff Hanger dude on “The Price of Right”.

Last Thursday, he was unceremoniously toppled over the edge – again like Bob’s spelunker here – and flung into the federal big house for 15 LONG YEARS.

What’s even better, some other fool, Terrence Correll who was considered the architect of the sham that bilked 519 people of up to $390 million, received a 12-year term.

This was not just folk and the ubiquitous “Mom an’ Dem”. Midkiff, 66, convinced his family, friends and his entire church that his pyramid scam was from God and took almost every dime they had for his own diabolical undertaking.

Midkiff wept as he apologized for his part in the scheme, although he said that he did not realize at the time he was committing fraud… Midkiff was convicted in August of 21 counts of mail and wire fraud and tax evasion. His partner Jerry Watkins has pleaded guilty to fraud and testified against Midkiff.

Oddly, the aforementioned story from the Minnesota Star-Tribune is about the judge who was incensed and heartbroken about sentencing a near septuagenarian with more time in the pokey than those evil ingrates at Enron.

Regretfully, there’s not a lot of pity I have reserved for this tool. Nor many others. Enron scammed and maneuvered cash through inside trading, and for that, they should burn in prison. Midkiff STOLE cash, and for that, he should be their bunkmates. Who knows, maybe with all that time in jail, Midkiff can build himself a sarcophagus – fitting cloak for a man who should perish in a “pyramid,” huh?