Tom Cruise: Godfather of Scientology

Posted: August 2, 2008 in Above the Fold, Keep it real, Snap, Crackle and POP Culture, Spin Doctor, Testify
Tags: , , , , , , ,

That’s right, Fame-o-philes. Get ready.

America’s favorite couch-jumpin’, no-Prozac-takin’, psychiatrist-hatin’, vertically-challenged havin’ basket case, Tom Cruise, is now the “Godfather” of Scientology.

No really, as in Mafia, organized crime, cement loafers and “Leave the gun and take the cannoli.”

At least, according to this lawsuit against the sci-fi church noted in the New York Daily News.

Evidently instead of donning Spock ears and other sexy Star Trek paraphernalia, members of the “Church” of Scientology have timewarped past all reality right into the same breath of Don Corleone. Note some of the legal writ:

Tom Cruise is named in a $250 million federal lawsuit that is using the RICO statute against the Church of Scientology. Ex-Scientologist Peter Letterese, a longtime critic of the church, filed suit in Southern District Court in Florida on July 15 alleging, among other things, that members of the church harassed him after he left.

…Letterese calls the church a “crime syndicate” and wants it broken up under the Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organization law, just as the feds have broken up Mafia families.

Nice, but not surprising. Check out this story from MSNBC for further proof of the “Administration” in the L. Ron Hubbard money-making empire.

Listen, any like-minded folk of believers that hide behind a shroud of religion IN SECRET and bully the world to keep it that way is – be definition – a CULT, not a church (MEMO to Masons, Covens and Scientology-ens).

What’s this sound like? They extrapolate money like building a bomb shelter is a necessity. They follow… er, scratch that… stalk folk that are no longer enamored with their wily ways.  They are always in spin control when interested parties do their homework, report their freakish ways and get lambasted publicly for being counterproductive sleuths on a mission to bash what they love.

Answer: A disgruntled baby-daddy from the NBA? No. CULTS. (I know, “slimy televangelists” may have been an acceptable answer as well. We can talk about that later. I’m on a roll).

If any pseudo-church tells folk one thing and denies access to know the real thing… well, do I have to draw you a map? Why does this “church” have most of Hollywood all romanced up? What’s the offer they can’t refuse? It surely ain’t Jesus and life eternal!

Whatever it is, it’s a money-fleecing farce, it’s a man-made multi-level marketing plan and it’s flawed to make anyone believe that life outside of the love of God is okie-dokee. There’s something seriously wrong in that opulent castle resting in the Hollywood Hills, and it’s not the fact a maid hasn’t been there in a while.

So, good on ya’ with the law suit. And MEMO to Tommy Boy: Maybe now it makes sense when the elders of the church heard Katie was pregnant, the card accompanying the bouquet of congratulatory flowers read:

“May your first child be a masculine child. Love, Capo Di Tutti Capi.”

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Comments
  1. […] In a previous – what appears to be prophetic – tag on the Wall, we noted Cruise was “America’s favorite couch-jumpin’, no-Prozac-takin’, psychiatrist-hatin’, vertically-challenged havin’ basket case, Tom Cruise, is now the “Godfather” of Scientology.” […]

  2. […] there was Tom “The Don” Cruise in Scientology extraterrestrial crop circles, there was Jason Beghe. The guy, probably most noted […]

  3. petermlopez says:

    Too funny! Great stuff as always. Keep up the good work, my brother.

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