Archive for July 21, 2008

“Amusement” – a word that basically means, “Not thinking”.

It’s something many people take for granted, but after a sweat-induced, on-your-last-nerve kind of day, you think about ‘not thinking’.

So, after dinner, talking with Missus HiScrivener and turning out the lights for the kids, a little amusement (and some Coke & peanuts) is just the thing.

That said, I like my amusement to come with drama, reality and a sense of ‘that could happen’. Shows like “Law & Order” (any of them), “CSI” (Vegas and NYC, only. Dude with his overacting and tacky tail shades get on my last nerves), “NCIS” (They best bring back DiNozzo), “Criminal Minds” (Shame they lost Inigo Montoya) and others.

Enter one more that will be a permalink in my TiVo – The Cleaner” featuring Benjamin Bratt (who’s been greatness since he starred as Paco in “Bound by Honor“).

This true story is about William Banks, a man who redirects his life in a hospital room next to his wife giving birth stoned out of gourd and begs God for help. This ‘deal’ he struck with God directs him to be an ‘avenging angel’ on earth and dragging every soul he can out of the grasp of drugs, and the enemy.

Did I mention they talk about God? A lot? And it’s real life, so yes, you hear some salty language and see some terrible things. But guess what? So did the Lord every time he looked at your (and mine) sorry self before you got right with Jesus.

I know we talk news here, but given what is typically offered on TV, I would say this potentially great show qualifies as just that. See below for a clip that should pique your interest. The pilot was nice, so here’s to hoping the next couple of episodes are as well, or I’m back to catching Bratt on “L&O” re-runs.

I love irony – be it verbal or situational, dramatic or even Socratic. It can come from anywhere, but when it does, the rub is like sandpaper on your blessed @$$urance.

Such as:

  • Break a date with your girl so you can go the game with the guys. During an intermission, you get up for a beverage and there chowing on a hot dog is none other than your girlfriend with a friend of yours who “couldn’t make it” to the game.
  • A recent discovery that sun screen could actually cause skin cancer.
  • Some uber-vocal, Hollywood quack supporter of PETA rockin’ the latest in leather-bound Versace dining on some nubile Veal Parmesan at the latest red carpet event.
  • A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break… at the R.J. Reynolds Tobacco corporate offices in Winston-Salem, North Carolina.
  • The members of one political party investigating ethics of the other political party.

Here’s another righteous example in this story fresh from the sacrosanct lips of Pope Benedict XVI and the down-under shores recently visited.

“In so many of our societies, side by side with material prosperity, a spiritual desert is spreading: an interior emptiness, an unnamed fear, a quiet sense of despair,” the pontiff said.

True, and you know, that would have been a resounding hit to the locals if he wouldn’t have befuddled the masses by raising his golden and diamond-encrusted scepter, allowing people to kiss that multi-carat bling on his finger, walking with his silk-robed entourage and flying off in private Bombardier jet.

Ah, there’s that rub again. Scratch, scratch, scratch.

This bleak story from the booming metropolis of Chattanooga, Tenn. continues the trend of loathing Christians without repercussion and an utter disregard for boating safety on the high seas.

You see, during the holidays it can pretty busy on the area lakes. Water sports abound and folk can’t wait to get their sun on. Even if that means getting churchy gets in the way of some sweet bass fishing. Exhibit A would be this tool:

…On the Fourth of July, a local church held baptism services at a public boat ramp for about 40 people. And while the services were taking place, an individual with a boat to launch became impatient and went ahead and put it in the water.

I suppose, holy practice is just another obstacle en route to hydro hysteria for this guy. As such, the people in the lake were about to be target practice in the proper use of speedbumps. Back to the trend of how hating Christians seems to be all the rage, and nowhere near punishable by law, here’s Exhibit B:

Mayor Bob Privett asked if anyone called the Soddy-Daisy Police Department, and Commissioner Shipley said, yes, and that the police arrived and talked to the driver of the boat, but did not give him a citation because it did not seem to be the right thing to do. Mayor Privett replied, “That was a good judgment call.”

Endangering lives, or at the very least – bad boating etiquette. And now, in the lovely township of Soddy-Daisy, if you wish to biblically “sit at the dock of the bay,” you need an edict from City Hall first.

I suppose one refreshing thing out of this story was a comment from the glib Mayor Privett:

“When we get to a day and time that a person can’t respect another person’s religious activity of baptizing, we’re in trouble.”

Prophetic… and pathetic, all at the same time.

It’s a good thing the Wall exists. Warning signs about the shepherds sheering the flock crop up everywhere, and folk just need to know the kind of charlatans that are out there.

God is not pleased people, and no place is that safe from his wielding eye. This time, the hand that bides takes us to Wheaton, Illinois.

Meet Rev. Andre Allen.

For 23 years, he was the beloved pastor of Second Baptist Church in this conservative suburb of Chi-town. And in one fatal night, he “handed” it all away for a nonsensical cause. The least Rev. Allen here groped two women while pretending to be a self-defense instructor at a gym in Schaumburg.

Now, that’s original. Well, apparently not.

Allen was also arrested more than a decade ago for allegedly touching two women in a provoking or insulting manner at a fitness center in Lisle.

There is a question I routinely get, “How are sharks like this allowed to feast on the flock from the pulpit?” Answer is a depressing, apoplectic, “I dunno.”

Somehow, I just have to believe God is weeding out the slack in this nation’s pulpits. Time is running out for fraudulent mountebanks like this to feast off unwitting parishioners, so I suppose it’s fitting this dude gets the holy boot for pretending to being something he is most certainly is NOT (you know, like a real pastor).

Good on ya, Rev. I hear McDonalds has some openings in the drive-thru.