You may have heard the adage, “Art imitates life.” Remember this post on the Wall about the latest [COUGH] ‘religious artifact’ brought across the border? If that was ‘art’, this post is real life, regardless how surreal it seems.
Well, meet God. Seriously, it’s from United Press International.
“God” here was busted for selling nose candy near his own church in Tampa, Fla. I don’t know what’s funnier. That story, or his full name: God Lucky Howard.
What? Having God as a first name didn’t provide enough good fortune? The guy had to rock with “Lucky” as a middle name. Something tells me he is one trip to Vegas away from living at the Salvation Army.
Back to the story…
Question: Why use THAT name and do THIS stupid thing?
I understand some of the saints need to smoke herb for medicinal purposes, but what’s the excuse for using flake? Bursitis in your knees flaring up again? Just can’t get rid of that headache from your weekend bender?
Seriously, this dude has a true issue when he meets St. Peter at the pearly gates (should he make it that far). Can’t you see that dialogue?
Why should you enter through these gates?
Well, uh, Pete? Is it? I had a name you may be familiar with, and believe me, brother, I was all about spreading joy.
Yeah, don’t think that will pass for true salvation and repentance, Mr. G_d. Besides, how do you make up for the scale and 22 grams of Coke found in your bedroom? Spicing up on your metric system studies? Oy!