Archive for May 2, 2008

Go Jonah GoMaybe Jonah wouldn’t think so, but my kids sure would. Can you imagine a modern day ‘Ride to Tarshish‘? You get in a boat (a la the log ride) and traverse the seven seas until a big whale swallows you up… and spits you out to safety. Sweet. Well, that may just happen.

Have you seen this story from Murfreesboro, Tenn.? That’s right amusement park fans, it’s BIBLE PARK USA.

Of course, the Body of Christ is anxiously awaiting the ACLU backing up their dump truck of legal writ as to why this park shouldn’t happen, but until then, let’s brainstorm some attractions:

  1. It’s not a ‘season pass’, it will be a ‘rapture card’ (as in “good until the rapture”)
  2. The Burning Bush transformed into a fully-interactive pyrotechnics show featuring Val Kilmer’s voice as Moses (note the link)
  3. The parting of the Red Sea can be a huge 10-foot walled aquarium
  4. Welcome to the Noah’s Ark petting zoo and the Four Horsemen stallion trick show (come on, you had to see those coming)
  5. A ‘Garden of Eden‘ arboretum (yeah, again, saw it coming)
  6. The Fiery Furnace‘ – a roller coaster that will make ask to be saved
  7. Solomon’s Temple‘ – a married couple’s hotel retreat.. woo-woo.
  8. The ‘In the Beginning‘ Planetarium – watch the universe unfold, well, actually, fold?
  9. In the Lion’s Den‘ big kitty-kat show: Ode to Siegfried and Roy
  10. And of course, ‘Walk on the Water‘ – one false step, kids and glub, glub, glub

Well, whenever it opens, here’s more information. See you there! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

…well, at least according to this recent column from the Christian Post.

HiScrivener has already posted the joy America’s favorite show created when it tweaked the lyrics to ‘Shout to the Lord,’ but evidently, that song is still making quite a buzz. You see, after the hubbub on rewriting lyrics, the A.I. crew came back and actually said, ‘Jesus’. The Christian nation rejoiced.

So, tell me, A.I. production team. Did you learn your lesson about not using the Lord’s name in vain with that song, or did you think because “Jesus Christ” was used in a Broadway hymn, it would be deemed acceptable by the ACLU? IJS.

Acclaimed director and creator of one of my Fave 5 of all time, Spike Lee, has FINALLY [as seen here] dipped his toe in the shallow end of Jeremiah Wright’s big mouth and onslaught of the Obama campaign.

Incidentally, amazing how one week you can be on record as calling someone a son, and the next, treat him like a redheaded stepchild with freckles and a bad case of gout.

In summary, Lee exclaimed about Wright:

“Jeremiah Wight needs to be quiet,” Lee said yesterday. “If he loves Obama he needs to shut up right now. It makes me question his motives for talking. I’m starting to wonder whether somebody has been contributing to the building funds of his church. Seriously.”

Spike, thank you for finally saying what needs to be said. It seems a good portion of black America has been applauding the wide chasm known as Rev. Wright’s mouth. I understand and appreciate the passion of which he speaks, but he needs to understand (since he is a theologian and all) a cutsy saying, “There is a time for everything.” Man, that would be a catchy song [cue harp music].

Memo to Jeremiah Wright: “Your 15 minutes NEED to be up.”