Hell. No?

It’s no secret that folk get uncomfortable when a pastor preaches for the altar call.

I mean, people get all squirmy thinking about the night before at the club and conviction besets paranoia with thoughts like, “I just know Pastor saw me there last night” and “God probably told him I was there.”

Whatever the cause, the effect is people flocking to the stage to get their lives right with Christ. Good times, right?

Funny. I don't many happy satanists or atheists. Hrm.

Well, not so much according to a recent Pew poll that folk just don’t believe in hell like they used to do.

Only 59% of Americans believe in hell, compared with 74% who believe in heaven, according to the recent surveys from the Pew Forum on Religion and Public Life.

That makes sense. Believing in heaven despite a relationship with Christ means you may still get to hang out by the Pearly Gates. No sweat, so back to the crack house you go. However, people don’t want to believe in hell because what if… you know, we’re right and they’re not. Whoops.

So, why aren’t more pastors preaching those cherished brimstone messages of yesteryear? It’s just not “in”?

The Rev. Fred Johns, pastor of Brookview Wesleyan Church in Irondale, Ala., said after a workshop discussion of hell that pastors do shy away from the topic of everlasting damnation. “It’s out of fear we’ll not appear relevant,” he said. “It’s pressure from the culture to not speak anything negative. I think we’ve begun to deny hell. There’s an assumption that everybody’s going to make it to heaven somehow.”

Somewhere, Carlton Pearson is giggling like a schoolgirl who got checked “Yes” in study hall for the quiz, “Do you like me?”

MEMO to pastors: You aren’t denying hell. You are avoiding it. And, inadvertently, leading others to it.

You know dang skippy no one changed the scriptures while you slept through seminary. Heaven is still coming with Jesus, and hell is still a place to get the worst sunburn in history.

This isn’t fashion that is “in” one day and “out” the next. It’s never Labor Day with Jesus and you can wear your whites all year long, brother. So, why?

A-ha! G’head. Admit it, you Caspar Milquetoast clock-punchers. It’s the economy, right?

The more you preach folk at the crossroads of heaven or hell, you are at another crux in the road of getting their tithe or watching that check walk out the door.

Call it what you want, emergent pastor… er, psychopablum pulpiteers… uh, you know who you are (and we do too).

Exit this post and turn left...

From Sheol to Hades, Gehenna to Tartarus. Even “the pit” if that knocks your socks off and gives you reprieve from your pastoral obligations.

Whatever you call it, just beware:

But we are all like an unclean thing, and all our righteousness are like filthy rags; We all fade as a leaf, and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away (Isaiah 64:6 NKJV).

I hope that sticks because no matter how good you look on TV, you are only as pretty as the last sinner you yanked out of the muck and the mire.

That’s the evidence of your global ministry - the people.

Maybe that’s why your righteousness should be like “filthy rags.” If you are doing God’s work, you are busy polishing off all the dirt on folks’ lives. Just a thought.

Oh, and if you don’t know Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior, call on him.

He loves you. He died for you. He lives for you now. Forget what you don’t hear in church. Just hear the knock on your heart… and let him in. Peace.

Creflo Dollar finally gives back some “change”?

Fresh on the heels of stories run-a-muck regarding one Creflo”he who lives up to his surname” Dollar getting sued for a text message enterprise gone the way of Bernie Madoff other professional kleptomaniacs, we have a strategic PR campaign… er, a moment of mea culpa.

According to this story from Charisma magazine, Creflo Dollar has been donating buckets of “change” to non-profit organizations across the nation.

Since February, Creflo Dollar has taken his Change Experience tour to five cities, giving away $10,000 in each location to a ministry making a difference in its community. During a tour event Friday in Denver, the pastor of 30,000-member World Changers Church International gave an unexpected $10,000 donation to The Gathering Place, the city’s only daytime drop-in center for poor and homeless women and children.

How else did the professional shot get taken? iPhone?

Never mind the fact these donations have taken place prior to a press release making its way to each city’s news outlets, I’m sure the mand of Gawd got this command FedEx from the Holy Ghost. (Wink. Wink.)

“In a time where so many people find the world caving in around them and have lost hope, that is when the body of Christ should be there with open arms,” said Dollar, who with his wife, Taffi, ministers to millions each week through their TV ministry and satellite church campuses. “We must be the change.”

Right you are, Taffi. It’s just too bad those open arms are jettisoned north only in the event of media coverage.

The Dollars are people of faith, right? They know the word, correct? Well, it’s not like I am a Seminarian or something, but perhaps it’s the Holy Ghost I am thinking of this note in canon:

“Be careful that you don’t do your charitable giving before men, to be seen by them, or else you have no reward from your Father who is in heaven.” (Matthew 6:1 NCV)

Thank God non-profit and faith-based organizations are being provided for in these terrible economic times. Even if the Lord uses Creflo’s dollars, that cash will put to great use.

All this story would have a wonderful slant to it if only the media wasn’t given the heads-up before your tent crusade pitches a media story before the tent it came in.

Why?

Why can’t a preacher be profitable without become a profiteer? Why is money-grubbing such a player in the whole “prosperity message.”

I understand that if a man can’t live a message, he shouldn’t preach it.

Nonetheless, if that was always the case, the entire body of Christ would throw up their hands and quit testifying and evangelizing because no one is worthy of living out salvation.

No one can back it up daily, and if they say they can, they are selling you something (you know, like this cat) but I would at least like to see some fruit instead of withered, old prunes dangling in front of TV cameras.

And what’s the charity going to say, “No, please, don’t tempt me with cash that can feed thousands of people we are trying to reach. We know you’re not the most righteous tool in the drawer.”

No, they are going to cash that big, floppy check quicker than Creflo can say, “rapture” and do what God has called them to do… despite the tool doing what he says he is called to do.

Jack Hayford: “Billy Graham is barely speaking”

“Our days are numbered. One of the primary goals in our lives should be to prepare for our last day. The legacy we leave is not just in our possessions, but in the quality of our lives. What preparations should we be making now? The greatest waste in all of our earth, which cannot be recycled or reclaimed, is our waste of the time that God has given us each day.”

Rev. Dr. Billy Graham

If any eyes has seen the glory of the coming of the Lord, it's his.

Very few people alive can ever find true inspiration from their own words. Regretfully, that’s the case with the most esteemed and recognized statesman of the Church in the 20th century, Billy Graham.

As a nonagenarian, things will fade. It’s expected. Only, not with Rev. Graham. His legacy is his life… and ours for the viewing. He is one of those people you would expect to escort Jesus back to earth upon rapture.

However, that’s not to be the case, per his friend and fellow man of the cloth, Jack Hayford.

In a recent interview with Minnesota’s KTIS Radio, Rev. Jack Hayford said Graham ‘can hardly talk now.’ You can understand him, but he could not get up and speak before a group,” Hayford explained.

Heartbreaking. According to the story, his long-time spokesperson and personal friend, A. Larry Ross, notes Graham is “does have bouts of weakness, but is lucid and remains interested in current events.”

I’m sure he does still ask about politics, religion and about the weather, but all that begs the question (in all seriousness):

Do you pray for healing for a 92-year-old preacher who has clearly done his work for the Lord, or just hope the Holy Spirit allows Graham some peace as he goes home?

In my life, I have known of anointed people taken from us way too early and others who are so old they sat behind Jesus in study hall. Yet, my experience with them was within years of going home to be with the Lord.

I, like most of faith-based Americans, feel like they grew up with Rev. Graham. And then there are those like Hayford and Ross (Larry, if you’re reading… I’m praying for you, my friend), who actually have.

So, do you pray? Do you just wait for the headlines? Or, do you just wait and see? What do you do?

Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints (Psalm 116:15 ESV)

With death of the saints being precious, can you imagine the hullabaloo Rev. Graham’s passing would cause in heaven?

Heck, a sizable portion of folks on the good side of pearly gates are probably there because of one of his crusades.

That said, is it selfish to pray for Billy Graham to stay or more of a godly thing to let him go? I don’t know but if he could talk, what would he say about the quality of his days now?

Godspeed, Billy Graham. After you, there will an infinite chasm in the Church that will never be filled.

God Sighting of the Month: I’ll be there

So, I have a Mea Culpa. It’s been way too long since we had an episode of our award-winning brickhouse series, “God Sighting of the Month.”

We had a real trend working. God, Jesus and the Virgin Mary were routinely making cameos in saltine crackers, voyeuristically standing in a hospital window and even making music in the frets of guitars. But, I suppose the telestial troika took the summer off for the holy cottage in the Hamptons because nothing has been in the news.

Not a Cheeto, a slab of jelly with a halo or even some dude blowing his nose and investigating the holiness inside.

Then it hit me. Michael Jackson died! Maybe you heard?

Wacko Jacko is back?! Maybe?

And with the way dolts in this world deified him (I mean, he was great, but God? Meh?) it made sense. The Prince of Peace must be giving the King of Pop his just desserts.

How do I know? Check this oddball story out of (where else) California where a Stockton family saw an image of God… Michael Jackson in a tree stump.

Although I’m thankful we are consolidating offering up our weekly “Cross Eyed” series and continuing “GSOTM,” seriously?!

These people are barking mad. (Yeah, I have been waiting all week for that line. Why do you ask?)

Here’s Felix Garcia, a 22-year-old resident of Stockton, out trimming his shrubs and like Saul of Tarsus… BAM! There was his revelation, the Man in the Birch Stump Mirror.

And now, half of Nor-Cal is taking numbers to see the hallowed tree. Some taking pictures. Others, plain curiosity. And then there is this nitwit:

“Because Michael Jackson was an icon to us,” said one neighbor. “To Stockton, Michael Jackson meant more to us than Jesus, to some people. I think they’re both about even.”

I realize is face was tougher than day-old leather, but resembling a tree? Really?

And then… well, you read the quote. I can’t go on. I’m just going back to my iPod and resist the temptation to say this is the most “Off the Wall” story I’ve heard in a while.